After traipsing down South Broadway for 4 days straight and viewing 60+ bands, it is a miracle that we are even alive, let alone posting this. The weekend consisted of watching some of the best artists that Denver has to offer, drinking amazing beer, mingling with fellow music enthusiasts, and soaking in yet another eloquently executed Underground Music Showcase. We’d like to begin by graciously thanking the staff and people behind the scenes. It takes a lot of valor to brave the wrath of over 400 diva musicians and a sea of drunk crowds, so let’s take a moment to thank them for allowing us to enjoy an amazing weekend.

Your staff at Ultra5280 was hard at work this past weekend and we took some notes, allow us to share them with you:

The only accessory better than a band tee, is a baby

Seeing a baby rock out with a pair of earmuffs on is equivalent to watching a bunch of puppies play in a bed of flower petals, it’s just downright adorable. Watching children run up and down the aisle of the South Broadway Church or sit on the shoulders of their hip parents made us realize, “Holy shit, we need to get ourselves a baby for next year, or at least borrow one.”

3 Kings Tavern and Hi Dive rival for the worst bathrooms, but best performances

We saw some of our favorite acts at these two venues. Between watching the stunning lead singer of Snake Rattle Rattle Snake confront the microphone with a virile effeminacy to fawning over the angsty teens of Residual Kid, these two venues really knew how to throw down. We were able to chug some Lucky U brews and pee in their less than pristine toilets. On a side note, why did the bathroom at 3 Kings look as if someone had put a fire hose to it? It was dripping water like a prehistoric cave. But, cave-ish bathrooms are a small price to pay when it’s in exchange for mosh pits at In The Whale or a dance party with The Epilogues.

Everyone’s in a band

One thing that took us by surprise was the sheer amount of “celebrity” sightings. One moment you’d be gawking at the sexy lead singer on stage and then the next moment their right by you doing the same thing to the next band. That’s the beauty of UMS, listening to up and coming artists pour the soul out on stage and then waiting in line next to them at the Port-a-Potty.

Earplugs are akin to a camelback of water in the desert

When you’re laying in bed to go to sleep and your ears begin to reverb the trumpets in Eldren from the day before, you know its time to forage around for some earplugs. It’s important to protect your ears, especially if you’re like us and want to go to shows when you’re 87 years old. So shell out the 50 cents for a pair, your ears will thank you. Be sure to check out our photos here.

Our Top 15 Acts (In no particular order):

1. American Tomahawk
2. Total Ghost
3. A. Tom Collins
4. The Ever
5. Residual Kid
6. Eldren
7. Whiskey Shivers
8. Wiredogs
9. Two Tone Wolf Pack
10. Sunboy
11. Goodnight, Texas
12. Real Estate
13. Navy
14. Fort Frances
15. Miniature Tigers

Our Annual: UMS BY THE NUMBERS

3 feet, 36 inches or 40 kilograms: The amount of MoJo Go Clif Bars that we ate

47: The cumulative amount of beer your Ultra5280 staff drank

358: The amount of photos that we tried to take at the Hi Dive that turned out with a red glow

27: The number of times we ran into the vagabonds of In the Whale (one moment their selling Otter Pops and the next they’re in the dunk tank)

3: The times we got tricked into eating the free Tasty Bites samples (this is 2 times too many and for that, we are ashamed)

6: The number of late night drunk burritos eaten at Illegal Pete’s

1: The times we cried while listening to Covenhoven at the South Broadway Church

12: The gusts of sweet, sweet air conditioned fresh air from The Goodwill that graced our flushed and sweaty faces.

1: The number of times we stalked Britt Rodemich from Shady Elders at the Hi Dive

9: The pieces of clothing required for Chon and Biktor’s ensemble for Total Ghost

1: The number of clothes left after Total Ghost’s performance

3: The number of times Castro got recognized for his bulldog

18: The amount of wristbands our arms adorned (collectively)

46: Number of business cards handed out

3: The number of Biker Jim's hot dogs consumed

6: The Deep Eddy Vodka drinks we crushed (I know it should have been more...)

3,008: The number of photos we took as a staff

18: The number of times we were asked if we are registered voters

Until next year......